Susan: YOU DID WHAT?!
Leonard: I chopped at your car with this ax. (holds out an ax with shredded metal hanging off of it)
Susan: LEONARD - I BOUGHT THAT CAR LAST WEEK!
Leonard: It was depreciating anyway. Why don’t you sit down? You seem a bit agitated.
Susan: OF COURSE I’M AGITATED, LEONARD. YOU FUCKED UP MY CAR.
Leonard: Yes, yes, let’s focus on the negative, shall we? No, you see, Susan? This is your problem. You choose to see the darker side in life. I am making an effort for you to choose the lighter side.
Susan: The lighter side of my car being in pieces?! What lighter side is there?
Leonard: Now you have a reason to walk to work and stretch your legs - you’re always complaining that you sit too much. Take in the fresh air, enjoy the morning sun on your face. It’ll be grand.
Susan: WE’RE IN SEATTLE, LEONARD. IT RAINS 9 MONTHS OUT OF THE YEAR.
Leonard: Again, so negative.
©2017 Emily Dalton